Monday 16 October 2023

An epidemic of loneliness

Last month, the Daily Telegraph published a very perceptive and poignant article by Melissa Twigg entitled The pub closures at the heart of Britain’s loneliness epidemic *, looking at how the decline of pubs was contributing to a worrying a rise in social isolation. This echoes many of the points I have made on this blog over the years.
Mikey Jones had been going to the Beehive pub in south London for a drink at least once a week since the 1960s. He usually ordered a pint of bitter, but on the night he met the woman who would become his wife, he had a gin and tonic to appear more sophisticated; on the afternoon his daughter was born, he had a stiff whisky.

The Beehive closed in 2018, as did another pub further up the road in South Norwood where Jones used to meet his friends. The latter is now a coffee shop serving flat whites and chai tea lattes and is crowded with young families and people with laptops – but for someone like Jones, who is 78, it doesn’t feel particularly welcoming. As a result, he mostly stays at home. “I’ve lived alone since my wife died,” he says. “My daughter does come to visit but other than that I am mostly by myself with the telly on.”

Jones is just one of the 3.83 million people in the UK who are chronically lonely – a figure that has increased by more than half a million since the pandemic hit, according to the Office for National Statistics. Technology is often treated at the bogeyman but around the country, the mass closure of pubs and community spaces is fuelling a health epidemic of epic proportions.

“Pubs are the archetype of third space – somewhere that isn’t home or work, but a place that brings people together beyond the immediate family or work,” says Thomas Thurnell-Read, an author and lecturer at the University of Loughborough researching the impact fewer pubs is having on British society. “Traditional pubs have faced very challenging trading conditions and the steady closure of them around the country rings a lot of alarm bells.”

The concept of the “third space” is a very important point. The pub provides somewhere you can get away from the constraints and responsibilities of the home and workplace, and to some extent allows you to let your hair down and lose your inhibitions. People often report that their best conversations occur in the pub. And, if you are retired or unable to work, it offers a “second space” where you can get out of the house and get and change of scene.

It isn’t necessary to have in-depth conversations, though. The simple act of going somewhere different and interacting with a member of staff to buy a drink provides some social contact. And in a pub it’s up to you to what extent you engage with others. I wrote about this back in 2016, when Red Nev made the comment that:

Pubs are the only institutions that I can think of where you can walk in off the street, buy a drink and be entitled to sit there as long as you like, with the option of talking to strangers or not, as you prefer.
However, the idea that people might want to go to the pub and simply chat, or just read the paper or sit in silent contemplation, is becoming increasingly unfashionable. People have to be doing something, whether eating a meal, watching TV sport, taking part in a quiz or listening to a band. I wrote a couple of years ago about how people less and less “just went out for a pint”.

Increasingly limited opening hours mean that pubs are often simply not open when lonely people want to visit them. Many older or vulnerable people prefer to drink during the daytime and are reluctant to venture out after dark. Yes, it’s a commercial decision, but it limits the social function of pubs. Another factor is the increasing reliance on electronic communications, whether app ordering or cashless payments, which reduces the level of human interaction in pubs.

Very often, the layout of pubs is remodelled to make them deliberately unappealing to casual social drinkers. Wetherspoon’s are often the last pub refuge available to people, but they typically have a regimented array of individual tables with loose chairs, rather than cosy alcoves of benches that encourage conversation. It’s not uncommon in Wetherspoon’s during the day to see whole rows of tables occupied by solo drinkers. If they were facing each other, they might be more likely to talk.

And one of the solutions suggested by Dr Thurnell-Read, while well-meaning, is likely to be anathema to many pubgoers just in search of a quiet drink:

…they include adapting them by day to create more of a cafĂ©-like environment where women and babies and laptop workers are welcome, and by introducing innovations such as small lending libraries.
Of course pubs are commercial businesses and cannot be expected to operate at a loss to serve a social function. And the idea of a council-run mock pub would be enough to make many pubgoers run a mile. But it can’t be denied that widespread pub closures, and reductions in opening hours and changes in the offer of those that remain, have exacerbated the level of loneliness in society.

Unsurprisingly, though, there is no mention whatsoever of the smoking ban legendary elephant in the room, which has been one of the biggest factors in the closure of community pubs over the past sixteen years. The pub is hardly a welcoming refuge if you’re forced out into the cold.

* The Telegraph article is paywalled, but if you would like to e-mail me, I can send you a copy of the full taxt.

27 comments:

  1. Old blokes don't want to talk to each other. That's why they go to spoons and put their headphones on and play with their phone.
    If old blokes wanted to talk to each other they'd go in the proper pubs, which they don't.

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    Replies
    1. As the article states, the proper pubs have in many cases either closed down or are not open at the times people want to visit.

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    2. chicken and egg. If they weren't abandoned by their customers, they'd still be open. So the lonely old men are clearly not out there keeping their pubs going.

      The story seems to me to be one of societal change, people finding social networks in other spaces and some people failing to adapt and falling through the cracks. A degree of atomisation as some people choose to live independently. The degree of choice/circumstance is never answered by anecdotal examples.

      Not so much one of the importance of pubs but of the irrelevance of pubs to anyone but an older generation that haven't chosen the new social spaces.

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    3. I think the prohibition in most workplaces including offices on lunch time drinking hasn’t helped opening hours.
      Oscar

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  2. I know that they are not to your taste but modern small "micro pubs" tend to force peop[e into close contact with other drinkers.
    Impossible to sit and quietly the read the paper in such establishment as someone, often the man behind the bar, will insist on talking to you.

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    Replies
    1. But being unable to escape sociability can be just as bad as none at all. I don't want to go in a pub and be grilled on who I am, what am I doing and how have I got there. Plus micropubs too tend to only open for limited hours.

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    2. Which is why I never go into a micro pub on m y own

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  3. Pubs play an important part in alleviating loneliness, and many people would just like to have a couple of pints and soak up the atmosphere. The level of interaction with others is less important, to some extent a change of scenery will do wonders for boosting people's wellbeing.

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    1. Spot on. I only recently found out my father-in-law, 85 and suffering numerous ailments, has been nipping out of the house to the non-descript Shep Neame pub at the end of his road for an hour's peace. He's never been a pubgoer before !

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    2. Seventy wasted years.
      How tragic !

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    3. He suffered all those years, but still knew that one day Madri would be invented. Now time to thank the Lord.

      Delete
  4. I recently wrote that "I dread to think what a terrible state my mental health would have been in with half a century of losing out on the many benefits of regularly using proper pubs, and I can hardly imagine not having known many friends in my local branch and more recently from this forum or not having met my dear wife in the Anchor at High Offley nearly 33 years ago". Those who remained single are likely to have benefitted even more from regularly using pubs.
    Using pubs isn't the norm for those growing up fifty years after us and I'm not aware of them having a
    suitable replacement which must mean that the epidemic of loneliness can only get much worse, not that that's a concern of "the Health Lobby" whose only interest is working towards prohibition.

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  5. WhatMudgieShouldDo17 October 2023 at 09:43

    Mudgie should set up a club for the old timers to meet in Wetherspoons and all sit at the same table. A spooners club for daytime drinkers that want a cheap pint and to say "ow do Alf" before ignoring everyone and reading the paper. Mudgie could lead a new social movement.

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    1. Misery Loves Mudgie18 October 2023 at 21:45

      Count me in and use my name young whippersnapper.
      I'm that curmudgeon sat in the corner who the bouldevardiers at the bar think is just an old git and little do they know I once performed unspeakable acts of carnal beastliness to several of their mothers.
      Sometimes you just the peace to remember the good times.

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  6. I'm In. What newspapers would be on offer?

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    Replies
    1. The "Feudal Times and Reactionary Herald" :-) Aficionados of Peter Simple will understand the reference.

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  7. My wife and I used to live in that part of South London some 30 years ago. There were many lonely single pubgoers around back then, whose only social life was the pub. In one of the pubs which we frequented, the landlord used to open on Christmas lunchtime like everywhere else - but then he'd reopen unofficially in the evening for all these lonely people, living alone in flats above the shops. It was a very friendly pub and all of the regulars knew of this arrangement. No-one wants to be alone on Christmas day.

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  8. I used to be a lonely old man. Then I joined CAMRA and got into the real ale. I'm still lonely but at least I heck a skinful with other lonely old men occasionally. The booze really does offer a temporary respite from the misery.

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  9. We should all be grateful for the role Madri plays in mens mental health.
    mates, madri, mens mental health.The 3 Ms to keep men mentally healthy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Marston's Merrie Monk mild marvellously maintained men's mentality

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  10. Re the Telegraph article.
    For anything that's behind the paywall just join the Telegraph with a false name and email and you're in to read it as a freebie.
    Also at the moment they're doing a great one-off £25 for a year of the digital version across as many platforms as you want.
    Has most of the same stuff in the online version.
    Anything decent and the Express normally nicks it for a re-write that day and their online stuff is free.
    And then there's the lovely old Guardian. I hate the bastards of course but their sports writing is superlative is are their travel columns and it's also great for a damn good laugh at the woke Sandalistas metaphorically fellating Jeremy Corbyn from their million pound Islington sheds. And all free.
    It must be a quarter of a century since I bought a paper newspaper with cash.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, I have got a subscription to the Telegraph, but I haven't paid anything remotely like full price for it.

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    2. Also the Britain behaving badly columns.
      Oscar

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  11. Professor Pie-Tin19 October 2023 at 10:05

    Strange decision by Spoons to pull out of the regional market in Ireland retaining just their Dublin interests.
    Cork, Waterford, Galway and Carlow.
    https://www.irishtimes.com/property/commercial-property/2023/10/18/jd-wetherspoon-seeks-10m-for-pubs-in-cork-waterford-carlow-and-galway/
    Far from being pubs for lonely old men they're in prime commercial spots and always looked very busy whenever I passed.
    Perhaps Timbo knows something about the booming Irish economy that we don't.

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    Replies
    1. They did something similar in Northern Ireland a few years back, just cutting back to the Belfast area. Not for me to reason why, but possibly the Wetherspoon's formula doesn't really fit with Irish drinking culture. BrewDog have also closed some bars in Ireland.

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  12. Talking of Brewdog, why do they name it after a silly pop craze from the eighties? Punk means 'trashy' in my book, so I don't buy the stuff!

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    Replies
    1. Say your name is Bob Shaw. You brew:
      Bob Shaw's Mild
      Bob Shaw's Bitter
      Bob Shaw's IPA
      Bob Shaw's Stout
      Original eh?

      ( © mudgie )

      Delete

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