Tuesday 10 September 2024

Can a copy beat the original?

After a successful introduction in Ireland, Draught Guinness 0.0 is now being rolled out in Great Britain. Both in canned and draught form, it has been one of the most successful beer launches of all time, and Guinness have had to expand production capacity at their Dublin Brewery to meet demand.

One report complained that it was only 55p a pint cheaper than the standard version, but surely that is about the kind of saving you would expect from not paying duty and the VAT on duty. It doesn’t cost any less to make, and indeed may even cost more due to the processes required for de-alcoholisation. Drinkers of alcohol-free beers have no right to expect a subsidy for being virtuous.

I wrote about the canned version last year, and concluded that, while it was “a triumph of the brewing technologist’s skill”, there was something of a sense of expectations unfulfilled about the experience of drinking it.

Draught or canned Guinness is certainly a very distinctive product in terms of its appearance, mouthfeel and taste, and the canned zero-alcohol version does a pretty good job of replicating that. From its look, and the first gulp, it’s just like a glass of standard Guinness. It’s only as you get further down that you realise something is missing, and by the time you reach the bottom of the glass you’re left with something rather dull and forgettable.
You end up feeling rather like this unfortunate cat.

So successful has Guinness 0.0 been that they have been suggestions that, given time, it could overtake the original alcohol-containing product. However, I would suggest this is part of the excessive hype surrounding alcohol-free beer, and there are two key reasons why it’s vanishingly unlikely to happen.

The first is that, however good Guinness 0.0 is, it can only ever be a diminished echo of the original product. It only exists because standard Guinness exists, just as decaffeinated coffee exists because of normal coffee. There are entirely valid reasons why people, in some circumstances, might want to drink alcohol-free beers, but all they are doing is part-way replicating the experience of normal beer.

And, never having known what normal beer is like, it becomes something of a meaningless activity. Someone might drink alcohol-free beer to join in a social occasion with their boozing friends, but there will come a tipping point when they think “Hey, Bob’s now the only one of us who’s actually drinking. Why are we even doing this?”

The second is that, while it tends of be downplayed in marketing and writing about beer, the key reason people drink it is not so much because of taste or refreshment, but because it has an effect on you. Not so much getting drunk as a gentle warm feeling, a slight relaxation of inhibitions and a stimulant to conversation. It can be seen as a social lubricant.

Alcohol-free beer can never do this, and so its original promise is never fulfilled. People are never going to go on alcohol-free pub crawls, unless tagging along with drinkers, and nor are they going to seek out obscure examples of artisanal alcohol-free beers. There are connoisseurs of fine teas and coffees, but those are natural products, whereas alcohol-free beer is by definition highly processed.

There is no doubt some scope for further expansion of the alcohol-free beer market, but ultimately it will inevitably hit a ceiling.

As a complete aside, a good example of the copy overtaking the original is the TV sitcom “Allo! Allo!”, which was originally a parody of the serious drama “Secret Army”, but ended up far surpassing it in terms of longevity and viewing figures.

25 comments:

  1. Indeed. There is something peculiarly unsatisfactory about it. Tried it out of morbid interest and it tastes like Guinness, but without any sense of enjoyment.

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    1. That's because neo-prohibitionists (religious or not) want it. Have a couple of bottles of FES.

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    2. Dublin brewed FES is the best thing to come out of St Jame’s Gate these days.
      Oscar

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  2. It's ok for performative beer drinkers I guess. But why would ya? The wokers will jump on it no doubt.

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  3. Decaffeinated tea and coffee, alcohol free drinks, dairy free cheese, meat free burgers. What's the point of it all, if it isn't to herald in a life free existence?

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    1. Remove all the enjoyment first then folks will be more willing to self-delete. That seems to be the desired end game.

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  4. In my opinion alcohol beer is pointless.

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  5. In my opinion alcohol free beer is pointless.

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  6. It amazes me that Murphy's, easily the equal of Guinness on its home turf has never crossed the water. But then again neither does the "good" Guinness.
    A fair few years ago a Scottish brewer produced a lovely stout called Gillespies, which strangely enough I only found in Wales. It just dissappeared.

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    1. There was a big push on Murphy's maybe 35 years ago, IIRC mainly in Whitbread group pubs. But it doesn't seem to have lasted. As I've said before, people aren't drinking stout generically, they are specifically drinking Guinness.

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    2. Selling two nitro stouts or taking Guinness off the bar is always going to be difficult. My local had the Belhaven Black and Guinness on the other week and I never see anyone on the Guinness.

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    3. I saw a report from a Holt's pub where someone had come in and asked whether they had any Guinness.
      "No, but we have our own Trailblazer Stout."
      "Never mind, I'll have a lager."

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    4. Because Guinness Draught has changed since 1959.
      Oscar

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    5. Murphy's was in a lot of pubs in the 90's. There were loads of adverts on the TV for it as well but I guess it didn't sell well enough as it has all but vanished form the UK nowadays.

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  7. I drink decaf on the advice of a cardiologist about 15 years ago when my ticker started playing up.
    I didn't have the heart (😉) to tell him it was caused by a seriously strong batch of skunk I'd been indulging in.
    The instant stuff is shite but I must have road-tested dozens of different varieties of beans and grinds over the years in my trusty old French Press before discovering M&S's stuff is excellent.
    As is my latest find, the Decadent Decaff Coffee Company who are the UK's No 1 Swiss Water Decaff method company.
    It is just as good as any Morning Joe I have ever tasted and indistinguishable from the real thing.
    And it gets me going in the morning like my old Mocha Parfait blend from the Algerian Coffee Stores in Soho's Old Compton Street.
    Having said that I'd rather drink my own cidery piss than a zero alcohol Guinness.
    A bit like vegetarian sausages - what's the ruddy point ?
    But if I was a designated driver for a bunch of pissheads I suppose it would stop me looking like a spare prick at a wedding.
    Agree on Murphy's too.
    I drank thousands of pints on both sides of the counter in Ireland and it is infinitely superior to Guinness.
    It just doesn't have the same marketing genius behind it.

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  8. Get used to it.
    Soon, this is all Kier will allow you to drink. It's the responsible choice that helps the NHS. If you love pubs, you'll support them and drink your 0.0

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  9. all that pretend guinness don't taste like guinness.

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  10. Murphys is still brewed by Heineken at Tadcaster, mostly for canning for the off trade, but there's still some finding its way into kegs for the on trade, and the volume must be reasonably high or Heineken wouldn't do it.

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  11. The cost of 0.0 is going to be high because it's brewed separately, to a different recipe to full fat Guinness in much smaller volumes before the alcohol extraction process which Guinness like to keep secret but must be reverse osmosis. And then, as with Guinness normal, you've got huge marketing budgets to pay for.

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  12. Pubs would be more inclusive and diverse if they went full 0.0

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  13. If you are obliged to eschew alcohol because you need t o keep a clear head then all the alternatives to a real ale are inferior. Water is too dangerous; fruit juices too sweet. Guinness zero is the best alternative |I have found: basically, the best of a bad bunch.

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    1. Yes, there is a place for it, but to my mind it is always to some extent a distress purchase.

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  14. I had been to a book talk was driving didn't want fizzy teeth rotters or fruit juice enjoyed it. Hope cooking larger does not write something witty slagging me off.

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    1. It's difficult to get fruit juice in pubs nowadays. All they seem to sell is that J2O stuff which is made with about 10 spoons of sugar in every bottle.

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